- Your victim breaks down into their constituent parts. Roll 1d6: 1=Sugar, Spice, and Everything Nice; 2=Snakes, Snails, and Puppy Dog Tails; 3= Earth, Fire, Wind, and Water; 4=Earth, Fire, Wood, Water, and Metal; 5=A neatly folded pile of skin, a carefully stacked pile of bones, a coil of intestines, etc.; 6=Carbon, Oxygen, Hydrogen, etc., with a 50% chance of highly radioactive or otherwise unstable material being present in a dangerous amount
- Smoke pours out of the victim's neck stump and forms into a genie that offers to grant one wish, provided the wish is no longer than four words and the first three words are "I wish for..."
- Confetti and candy shoot out of the victim's neck stump, and children can be heard cheering in every direction.
- The victim picks up their head and carries it around, being all like "No big deal, guys." The Quest-Giver now works stupid head-related puns into conversation as much as possible.
- The Quest-Giver disappears Obi-Wan Kenobi-style, leaving just empty clothes and possessions behind. They may return as a blue ghost at the referee's discretion.
- The Quest-Giver's head grows limbs and starts scampering around like John Carpenter's The Thing. I hope you brought fire.
- The victim's body turns out to be a lifeless mannequin. Which you've possibly been talking to for quite a while.
- The victim turns out to be three children stacked on top of each other and disguised as a single adult. And now you've just decapitated the topmost child.
- A new head pops up in place of the old one. There is a 50% chance that it is either comically tiny or unreasonably huge. There is also a 50% chance that it is either identical to the original head or that it is identical to someone else's head (referee's choice). If this new head is chopped off, rinse and repeat (but with an even bigger or smaller head).
- Your victim's blood shoots at least six feat into the air like a geyser or a high-pressure fire hose. The gushing lasts 1d6x10 seconds. Then roll 1d6 again: a secondary spurt of that many seconds happens shortly afterwards.
- Some kind of lumpy homunculus craws out of the victim's neck stump, grows tiny wings, and tries to fly away in order to report your actions to its mysterious master.
- The disembodied head explodes with the force of a hand grenade. On top of that, there's a 50% chance it also sprays the area with that ink that department stores sometimes put in security tags on clothing, and an additional 50% chance it produces a cloud of foul-smelling fumes that seem to stick to everything like skunk spray.
Tuesday, October 18, 2016
So You Decapitated the Quest-Giver
Roll a d12: